Ever read the book called The Power of Yes?
I haven’t.
But I’m assuming that it’s about saying “yes” more often.
I’m all for saying yes.
Yes to a date with my babe, a spur of the moment hike, HH with a friend, &/or to skydiving on a random Saturday ( << ya, so this happened ).
Yes can be really F-ing great…if it’s the right situation.
Lately though? I’m learning the power of NO.
N.O. No. N-O.
As in cutting anyone or anything that’s poisonous from my life. I’m done with negativity. And I think that comes with maturity & becoming an adult.
I’m saying no to things I maybe would have awkwardly, uncomfortably agreed to when I was teenager.
Saying no can be declining a wedding invitation from someone you haven’t heard from in ten years ( I mean, honestly? If you haven’t spoken to someone in ten years it’s not necessary to send a wedding invite. Save the paper. Sorry I’m not sorry ).
Saying no can mean staying in bed instead of getting up early to workout because you’re just F-ing exhausted.
Saying no can even be taking a Saturday night off away from texting/e-mails/etc. & turning all devices off to spend quality time with someone special.
Is anyone with me? Or am I being a nasty-ass, bitchy brat?
I mean, wouldn’t you rather surround yourself with positive, healthy people ( & situations—! ) that are uplifting as opposed to being around Debbie Downers?
Seems logical to me.
Oh, & naturally there’s one little sex kitten I can’t say no to…Pixy. Those big brown, perfect eyes get me every time.
xx.L
Well exactly, it’s all about balance. Saying NO to toxic friends & situations feels just as good as saying YES to the positive & healthy stuff! Great post 🙂
I am a BIG believer of ridding of anything and ANYONE who is negative in your life. You have to rid of these people and events to make room for more of the good stuff. Cleaning out your closet leaves room for more NEW goodies, this is the same in life! Lots of POSITIVE events and people your way <3 C
Lauryn,
I’m completely with ya! No room here for negativity, I’ve cut those people out of my life. It is hard to do but I think best for me. Just like a smoothie, organic foods, healthy make up, and exercising…choosing those things over the negative options is best for me. Buh-bye haters!
Xx. H
I really enjoyed this post – it’s simple and clear! I am definitely learning the power of both YES and NO – it’s amazing once you can make clear distinctions. I think it is important for individuals to know his/her own boundaries and then the YES and NOs come easily 🙂
x Nats ~ coraltintedperceptions.blogspot.com
Good for you, L! You are right- it takes maturity to see that you have the power!!! Last year I had to “break up” with a very close friend. I realized that after nine years, she was continuing to put herself in negative situations, and even though I offered all the help in the world throughout our friendship, she continued to make the decision to NOT better herself. That’s when I realized, the only things I can control are my own actions, and I broke it off so that I could move forward with a drama-free life! It’s sad and I still miss a lot of things about her, but my life is much more even-keel without her bad decisions bringing me down.
So no, IMO you are not being a brat! Just keep doin’ you, girrrrrl! xoxo
You aren’t being a brat at all! I just learned how to say no over the past year and it has taken away so much stress! Saying “no” simply means you’re putting your wants first which is a good thing.
I think when you are younger you say yes to everything because you feel like you should or you might hurt somebody’s feelings. Now that I’m a bit older, I say no way more often because I’m more concerned about what will make me happy.
Could not agree with you more! Well said and love the example of the wedding invitation!
http://ishowedupinboots.com
This is SUCH a great post!! It is so relevant to so many aspects in life. I especially have found lately that the power of “no” has made it possible for me to reach my health, fitness, and happiness goals! Saying “no” to staying out too late and getting the sleep I need, saying “no” to unneccessary calorie splurges and getting the right amounts of nutrients I need, saying “no” to being lazy and getting the exercise (regularly!) that I need… ETC! SO glad you wrote this!! How encouraging. Keep it coming!
Someone sent you a wedding invite after 10 years of no talk? WOW! Maybe that person should learn the power of NO, that’s a little inappropriate.
Cutting out all negative people needs to be done at some point in every one’s life, I mean, there’s only so much of “high school” drama you can take. Leave it for the youth. I’m out.
Great post!
I kept thinking of that movie “Yes Man” the whole time I read this…but you’re totally right. Sometimes you just have to say no!
I love that you share these feelings…I have been feeling the same way these days and I was just wondering if I’m just turning into a snobby brat but I think it’s so true…as much as saying yes is a good thing it’s also important to say no to things that don’t make you feel good!
AMEN to this post! I feel the same way, I have always felt guilty or like I am going to miss out on something major if I don’t say yes to everything but the truth is I enjoy my free time more when I say no to things I just don’t want to do. Saying No to unwanted situations/people can sometimes be more zen than yoga!
Love this post! I’m hitting that age where saying NO is becoming easier and easier. At this point in my life I know who I am, who my friends are, and what is important to me. So the majority of the time I’m a YES girl, but it feels good to say NO and not feel guilty about it!
Ya girl!! Love this post. Totally tagging this on my top five today. You rock.
Amen! I think you nailed it on the head with this post!
I think we may be on the same brain waves… was just thinking about this same thing! Definitely hard but necessary to “suck the poison” out of life in order to be happy and healthy!!
xx B
I think the moment you start saying ‘Yes’ to anything good, you start saying ‘Yes’ to happiness. And when you say ‘Yes’ to anything good, you’re saying ‘Yes’ to more of the same good things coming into your life. Same applies to people. Say ‘Yes’ to being/making friends with positive people, and you won’t even have to say ‘No’ to negative people being in your life, they will just automatically fall out when you focus on the positives that you do want in your life.
Preach it girl! As long as you are staying true to yourself, and being polite to those you’re saying ‘no’ to, its the best way to be!
This post couldn’t have come at a more perfect time. I just said no to a friend’s daughter’s Bday party because someone has special plans for my bday. I have always struggled with saying no to people. Thank you for this post, really made my day.
Oh I completely agree with you! Life is to be enjoyed, and why would you waste it on things you don’t want to do and people who add nothing to it? Of course that does not include actual responsibilities, and sometimes we should do something we don’t necessarily want to if it means helping someone out. There are exceptions for everything, but in the whole I agree with you completely!
Teffy {Teffy’s Perks Blog }
Hell to the yes! I loooveeed this post.
It can be mega scary to say no to people, events, and things that aren’t really helping you or your life at all, for reasons I still don’t understand! I’ve had to work on being okay with letting some negative people go and counting on having fewer, better quality friends than a big group of girls who just wanted to bring other people down. It’s uber uber important to surround yourself with people as or more driven, ambitious, positive, and successful as you are. It’s rad to hear that other people are facing the same thing, and obviously coming out on top!
More power to you girlfriend
I recently lost a friend of mine, who was pretty well known. I did a friend detox after that. Everyone was so concerned with why she did what she did. I realized it’s not the quantity, but the quality of the people in your life. So yea … saying no to people and events and random shit like that … so freeing!
I agree with everything in this blog, Such freedom when you say no and that you actually listen to what you want instead of trying to please everyone…great job!! Stay positive
There are only three things that you should never, ever say no to.
Those are food, sleep, and puppies.
Apart from that, ‘No’ is a freaking awesome word. If you don’t want to do something for genuine reasons, then you shouldn’t! Totally agree – life is too short