Tag Archives: The Skinny Confidential

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The Same Penis Forever Playlist

Updated: October 26, 2016


The sign really popped out of the bushes all weekend, you know. Front & center, it read: SAME PENIS FOREVER.

All sparkly & glittery, reminding me every second while I downed the chilled rosé.

Couldn’t really avoid the sign, it stuck out like a sore thumb.

…Ok, ok but if we’re going to have the same penis forever, let’s definitely have an INSANE playlist? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

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( Some of you asked, you can find the sign on Etsy ).

A little side story: the second I got to the house, the demands started. Not like mean demands. Just micro-managing-the-shit-out-of-my-friends demands. Picture Lady Tremaine, the stepmom in Cinderella in bed with her cat, Lucifer LISTING OFF HER absurd scroll of requests. I mean I didn’t actually have Pixy but if I did I’d be petting her aggressively in an evil, diabolical way. So. I was walking around making my annoyingly anal demands ( “WHERE ARE THE FLORAL PRINTED S’MORE STICKS, MIMI!”, “JORDAN WE NEED TO HAVE A DISCO BALL COCKTAIL MOMENT!”, “ERICA IF I DON’T HAVE PINK SUGARED RIMS ON THE MARGARITAS, WHAT’S THE POINT?” ) & I suddenly, amidst demands, I REALIZED there was no music.



Immediately I cried out for Jordan & basically harassed her all night saying “I DON’T WANT TO LIVE WITHOUT MUSIC POOLSIDE.”

Long story short after 2398472 dramatic statements, Jordan got the music working. THANK GOD!

( FYI, when I act like this Mimi & Jordan call me “Laurie” ).

We listened to the whole playlist & then somehow ended up ( drunk? ) dancing to Britney Spears… but like through the decades. Eer, we started from the beginning & ended up in 2016. Favorite dance moves happened around “Lucky”…I think?


Anyway, below is the actual playlist we listened to all, ALL weekend. Some of you asked on Snap; your wish is my command. I can’t take full credit though, Jordan put it together on a whim & per usual, all her songs are just SO on point.

( she did forgot the Bossanova (!!!), but I won’t go Laurie on her. HA! Jordan, hinty hint for the wedding? )

Ok whether you’re going out this weekend, working out, or commuting— you gotta check out this Spotify playlist, k?



The Skinny Confidential Workout Playlist
TSC Summer Workout Playlist
TSC does Europe Playlist
TSC Kick Yo Ass Into Gear After Thanksgiving Playlist
TSC Champagne Dance Party Playlist
TSC Sweaty, Sexy Playlist
TSC Vibezzz
TSC Bougie Bossanova Playlist

♡ | ♡ | ♡


Many more bachelorette-inspired posts are coming your way but I had to set the vibe with some tunes. So pop some champagne, turn up the volume, & stay tuned for a VERY bachy week of blog posts. A lot to share.

And hey, if you’re not engaged— who cares? Steal some details for an upcoming sorority party OR a friend’s birthday bash. You can apply any & all these ideas to your own life. It doesn’t have to be all wedding-y.



Please let me know your thoughts! Anything we’re missing? So easy to add songs to this playlist so the more recommendations the better.

Going to bed, x

– lauryn ( or Lady Tremaine, whatever works )


SHOP IT: body jewels | buzzed AF hatcell case | choker | top | skirt | PIPER champagne

+ TWO MORE DAYS to enter the $4000 dollar bachelorette giveaway. It takes 5 seconds to enter. ALSO, new podcast episode is live…guess what it’s about? LOL…basically Michael & I get candid about a BUNCH of random topics. Free to listen.

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What’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic Soleil

What’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag

Updated: October 26, 2016


In collaboration with BIC Soleil

What’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic Soleil

Toiletry bag time! WELL, I call it a Dopp kit but whatever, you get the drift.

Anyway, since most of May was spent traveling, I figured a toiletry post was kind of in order, you know.

The more I travel, the more specific I become with packing. Which is just weird because I’m normally the ‘pack in five seconds’ sort of person.

That’s CHANGED. I now have a ready, set, go Dopp kit. This is perfect for when Michael decides he’s ready to go to LA. I just throw the little bag right into my oversized purse with some t-shirts, jeans, & underwear…& we’re ready.

What’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic Soleil

Let’s break down what’s inside my ready-to-go toiletry bag, shall we?

Gold rimmed glasses: you know those days you don’t want to wear ANY makeup? I have A LOT of those when I’m traveling. Sometimes, I just want to throw on some tinted sunscreen & lip balm with a pair of gold rimmed glasses. You know, be lazy. I found these online for like $5. No need for makeup with them either. The perfect travel companion!

Body tape: this has saved my life multiple times ( a nip slip is SO embarrassing ). Basically, if you’re wearing a low cut dress or top this tape ensures everything stays in place. It’s just like regular tape…but for your body.

What’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic SoleilWhat’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic Soleil

Razors: of course a razor!!! Because what’s a toiletry bag without a razor? I cannot travel without my OWN razor. Do you blame me? It just feels better, more home-ish. As you know I’ve been using a BIC® Soleil® razor for the past three months & loving it. It’s a super effective razor, AND it’s pretty, pretty. The kind I like best is called BIC® Soleil Shine®. Once you try it, you’ll never stray. I keep the pink one in my shower & the yellow one in my Dopp kit. EASY. Gotta keep it smooth.

Eyebrow brush: you should know, brushing your eyebrows UP is more important than brushing your hair. These little pink eyebrow brushes are everywhere & anywhere around my life. I keep about 5 in my travel toiletry kit. The best time to use them is after filling in your brows. Just brush up & you’re golden. Ideal for travel.

Aswangandha herb: YES. I’ve talked about this before. A little bottle is always in my travel kit because it’s awesome for the immune system. There’s been more than one time that I’ve been on an airplane with a coughing kid. UGH. This stuff saves me. Plus it’s helpful for sleeping. Search online, trust me: aswangandha.

What’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic SoleilWhat’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic Soleil

Other random additions: nail clippers, rubber bands, cotton balls, rose hip oil, facial products, nail polish, double sided pearl earrings, jewelry cleaner ( cleans my jewelry! ), ice roller ( only when I’m traveling for a while ), alligator clips, & UTI meds ( just in case, LOL ), birth control, & some supplements.

All these stay pretty in my toiletry bag. If you’re always running around like a psycho, the best way to stay organized is to just have it set & ready. This toiletry bag has saved my life more than once. I never have to worry about keeping my legs smooth or my boob falling out, very practical actually.

Alright, anything I’m missing? I know some of these items are very, VERY random but what can I say? HA!

Off to watch some TV, drink some ginger tea, & CHILL.

Chat tomorrow, lauryn x

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What’s In My Travel Toiletry Bag | by the skinny confidential featuring Bic Soleil



Bachelorette Makeup Haul

Updated: October 21, 2016

clinique makeup | by the skinny confidentialclinique makeup | by the skinny confidentialEvery girl loves a good makeup haul.

This one is coming at the ideal time because I’m currently at my bachelorette party in Palm Springs. You guys are invited, of course – just come follow along on Snapchat ( @laurynevarts ).

Ok so Clinique was kind enough to hook it up with some amazing products AND I’m very much excited because their whole brand screams bachelorette/Palm Springs/TSC. Honestly I’m loving how all the products match with my party’s aesthetic. Like it actually gets me weirdly excited?

Anyway, let’s get into bachelorette makeup details.

As you guys know, I love unpacking/unboxing on Snapchat. But it’s even more fun to unbox when there are products you will actually use, products that ‘get it.’ Clinique’s products do not disappoint. I can say that, because shit, I’ve been using them since high school.

For the record, my favorite is Clinique’s ‘Superprimer’ & long lasting gloss, I headed to Macy’s to stock up on all of my Clinique necessities. I obviously based these purchases off my bachelorette party ( TYPICAL ). Both will be very needed. Especially since we’re going to be poolside. I need a good lip gloss that lasts all day.

Since we are going to be in the sun, I am making sure to not overdo it on the whole makeup thing. Light, fresh, dewy, approachable. Basically, here’s the plan:

SPF 50 to start because sunscreen is the first thing you should do while you’re in Palm Springs, right? Then I’m adding Superprimer. This is one of the best primers I’ve ever tried because it gives you dewy skin to start. Afterwards, just adding a little concealer, a bold brow ( BRUSH UP! ), & some High Impact Extreme Volume Mascara ( curling the lashes before, obviously, we gotta keep it flirty ). Finishing the look off with some Superbalm moisturizing gloss & I’m good to go.

Afterwards I’m using Take The Day Off Cleansing Milk ( YUM ) & a little After Sun Balm. So BACHELORETTE PARTY-esque!

I feel like I need to film a makeup tutorial soon. Thoughts?


NOT ONLY are these bachelorette products on point, I also received a free grab bag from Macy’s. One that’s available to everyone & anyone between September 29th to October 17th. This little makeup travel bag contained all the goods plus more ( my most favorite DEFINITELY being the ‘High Impact’ mascara. Get it in black, just trust me ).

Here’s a quick breakdown:

· Bonus Exclusive Cosmetics Bag.
· Dramatically Different Moisturizing Lotion.
· Take The Day Off Makeup Remover For Lids, Lashes & Lips.
· Bonus First Clinique Pop Glaze Sheer Lip Colour + Primer. Part of you.
· Bonus Choice Eye & Lip colour collection. Choose Sultry or Sweet.
· High Impact Mascara in Black.
· Clinique Happy Perfume Spray.

All these fun goodies are available at Macy’s with any $27.00 purchase.


I feel like we have so much to talk about BUT I’m currently in Palm Springs, enjoying my girlfriends, a little ( A LOT? ) pink champagne, & an obnoxious amount of floaties ( it’s almost like you can’t do the pool thing without a good floaty nowadays ). Expect a full recap of the entire party with all the juicy details next week. There’s so much to spill, I really cannot wait to share with you guys.

Happy, happy Monday,

lauryn x

+ this post is in collaboration with Clinique at Macy’s and ShopStyle, as always all opinions are my own.

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Are You An Introvert Or Extrovert?…OR AMBIVERT?

Updated: October 21, 2016


So much to get into but first I will discuss outfit details because HELLO, HAVING SUCH A HOUNDSTOOTH MOMENT right now.

My love for houndstooth started with an antique store.

When I was dead broke circa 2008 I found this tiny little stool for my room that was covered in houndstooth. It was so charming. I bought the stool for $9.95 & brought it home to my room. On top of it I stacked some of my favorite coffee table books ( you have to get creative when you have no space for a coffee table ). The whole set-up was so special to me. Anyway, ever since I love a pop of houndstooth.

Which is exactly why I IMMEDIATELY purchased these pants from Nordstrom the SECOND I saw them. These houndstooth pants are very much my vibe & give off all the fall feels. To even out the look, I did a black turtleneck. Especially loving this one because it’s not too turtle-y. Meaning it doesn’t go up too high on my neck. It’s Parisian chic, you know?

SHOES. Ok so, Ivanka Trump designed these FABULOUS must-have boots that every girl should own for fall. Really, they’re the perfect bootie. I plan on rocking them with jeans, midi skirts, & lots of trousers. To finish off the look: a crimson lip. This get up is something you can wear over & over ( trust me, I’ve rocked it all at least 3 times thus far ). AND it screams fall.


There’s something romantic about making the switch from summer to fall, clothes-wise. You kind of have to bundle up, bring out the pumpkin spiced candles ( BASIC but SORRY they’re too good ), & dust off the boots. I’m very much about it.

On a completely different note, I recently read a post on Marianna Hewitt’s blog all about how she doesn’t fall into the extrovert OR introvert category.

In fact, she identifies as an AMBIVERT.

Hmmm. After reading the definition, I REALIZED I AM AN AMBIVERT as well.

DEFINITION…Ambivert ( noun ): a person whose personality has a balance of extrovert and introvert features.

To go further, this source states: “An ambivert is rather balanced for the most part, or at least we try to be; we seek social settings and the company of others and do so quite well. We aren’t overly loud and aggressive like the extrovert can be, but we enjoy being outgoing and do so on our own terms. We also enjoy our solitude, but aren’t quite as extreme with it as the introvert. We need both settings rather equally to be fully happy. As I mentioned above, we don’t function too well in either direction for extensive amounts of time. When this happens, we are a mess. Again, we need balance.

With that being said, the ambivert can sometimes be confusing to others; having both traits, we can sway too far in either direction rather easily. Our behaviors are likely to change with the situation, and we can easily become “unbalanced.” We enjoy doing something…until we don’t. These behavior “fluctuations” are a result of our need to find and stay balanced.”


I am also a Gemini.

Sometimes I want to go out, be social, have a few margaritas, & shoot the shit.

Other times? I want to be completely alone, cleaning the house or organizing, listening to music, maybe a podcast, with candles & oils going.

If I don’t get this type of alone time, my mind & body crave it.

I get grumpy.

For me to give off good energy in public, I have to give myself a reset. Kind of like a battery charge.

That reset comes from alone time.

A lot of the time I’ll go out to dinner alone…or even to a movie.

Along with the social / alone time thing, I also like time spent with Michael. But quiet time. I like to read in bed in silence or watch a movie.

So the point: I don’t identify with the extremeness of an extrovert or an introvert.

My body craves both.

It really depends on my mood, the time of the month ( LOL ), or if I’ve had enough sleep.

When you’re aware of what YOU need you’re able to develop a better sense of self. Kind of a mind / body connection. Ultimately, I believe this can make you a better friend, lover, & person. SELF-AWARENESS IS KEY.

I like listening, but I like talking. I don’t mind hanging out with new people, but I love hanging out with my friends. I’m happy out on the town but perfectly content at home. Some people would say I’m loud, others would say I’m quiet. If I don’t get alone time, I become tired.

Is anyone else like this?

What are you? Do you fall into the category of an introvert, ambivert, or extrovert? Thoughts?

I’m off to prep for wedding festivities. I mean, it’s perfectly reasonable for me to be dedicating some time on the weekend to the wedding when we’re a month away – right? HA.

Be sure to stalk this look on Nordstrom. It’s definitely my favorite fall look & JUST SCREAMS PARIS, ESPRESSOS, ROMANCE, & MULLED RED WINE. So good.

Until next time,

x lauryn

SHOP THE POST: pants | turtleneck | boots | lipstick ( color: ‘Media’ ) | sunglasses

+ this post is in collaboration with Nordstrom. As always, all opinions are my own.

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Updated: October 21, 2016

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OMG OMG OMG if you know me, you know I LOVE a good phone case.

You know it’s gotta be something that fits my aesthetic though. Something cheeky. A dash of wittiness. Flirty, of course. Mix in some white, light pinks, a pop of black & I’m happy.

But nothing was doing it for me………….

………..so I partnered with Casetify to create my DREAM PHONE CASES.

That’s right, from start to finish we designed TSC-ESQUE phone cases.

I mean shit, makes sense. I’m on my phone enough? But who isn’t? it’s kind of the remote control of our lives. So it’s gotta be cute.


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We need to get technical first.

I drop my phone. A lot. Like, a lot a lot.

In fact, it was cracked for two months until I recently bought a new one.

SO I am VERY thrilled to announce all of these TSC cases completely protect your phone. Casetify’s cases are made of a “durable hardshell exterior, co-molded with a soft, impact-absorbing inner layer for complete protection in a flexible, secure & lightweight form. Raised bezel around perimeter keeps screen protected while durable hardshell exterior provides surface protection.”

Every Casetify product is made-to-order & hand-inspected from corner to corner. They ensure high-quality products & promise 100% satisfaction. YES PLZ.

You should also know that these cases come off & on VERY easily. No prying the cases off to the point where it ruins a good manicure ( SMH, such a waste ). They pop off & on QUICKLY.

…AND they won’t break the bank. Each case is $40 bucks. None of that $85 dollar phone case bullshit. 30% goes to the Breast Cancer Foundation too. October is breast cancer month so timing ideal. FUN RIGHT.



Let’s breakdown each case, shall we?


Boobs because I love boobs! I designed these cases with the Breast Cancer Foundation in mind but definitely mixed in so many TSC vibes.

I mean you guys know I love talking about boobs.

For the record: THE BOOBS case is the one Michael & all his friends want. They’ll all be rocking this case on their phones come Monday. Pretty cool for a guy in my opinion.

This case is super cute for an Instagram selfie in the mirror. I can already see myself holding a glass of rosé in an Insta mirror pic. Not going to lie, may have designed this one ESPECIALLY FOR those mirror pics. Comes in 3 colors.



UM YES. How flirty is this case? We designed this is for the girl who doesn’t give a F. The ballzy bitch. She’s no bullshit, cool, & FUNNY.

Honestly I’ll wear this one all the time because I think it’s hilarious. It’s feisty & a real statement. AND it’s even funnier if you’re in a relationship. I don’t know why this cracks me up but it does ( everyone who’s married should get this as a JOKE. Scare your husbands ).

Obviously very excited to do a couple flat-lays with this one ( yes, this is how my brain thinks, HA! ). I feel like this will look really cute while I’m texting too…is this weird?



UGH. I just love this so much. If you follow along on Snapchat you know I ALWAYS make Michael carry my purse.

“Always make the guy carry your purse” has become my Snapchat motto. Lately you guys have been snapping me pictures & videos from around the world of your BF/husbands/girlfriends carrying your purses. I laugh my ass off every time.

So if you’re a bossy badass, this case is for you. Definitely one of my favorites AND FYI: IT’S TO DIE FOR IN PERSON AND ON AN ACTUAL IPHONE.


Come on now, you know I couldn’t do boobs without a sexy bra right?

This case is designed for the girl who needs to be a lady killer at work, but likes to let loose afterwards ; ). IT’S VERY FEMININE with a little twist…it’s sassy, but not too risqué. Clearly this one’s screaming TSC vibes. Comes in 3 colors.



Last but most certainly NOT least, THE BOOTY CALL. This case was inspired by Barbie. I did a Barbie-ESQUE/neon sign font & just got straight to the point.

Very much my style, you know. Can’t wait to rock this case at happy hour with friends. I think it’s sexy & CHEEKY.

I designed this case for the bold, powerful, independent babe who likes to HAVE SOME FUN.

( WELL SHIT can you tell I named them? QUITE obvious, isn’t it ).

Color options: white, nude ( transparent ), French rosé ( light pink ), & bubblegum pink ( Barbie pink ).

+ Case sizes are for 4, 5, 6, 7 iPhones & iPods ( normal, S, & Plus ) & Android phones.

Just in time for the iPhone 7 launch. The ideal PROTECTIVE case.


Now for the good stuff. Let’s talk TITTIES.

That’s right, tits.

Tomorrow we’re throwing a little launch party to celebrate the announcement of The Skinny Confidential x Casetify collection at Gracias Madre. The theme of the party? Titties!!

How appropriate for the girl with a boob job, HA.

Think full-on titty party: boob cupcakes, boob cases, boob balloons, boob cookies, boob cases…ANDDDDD most importantly, 30% of sales will go towards the Breast Cancer Foundation. Naturally the table will be filled with flower arrangements from Seed Floral, candy vases full of Sugarfina champagne & rosé gummy bears, & some boozy snow cones too. Want to come with? Just follow along on Snapchat. It’ll be fun.

OK SO I hope you love the cases! Really, really took my time designing each one with the amazing Ghostmouse team— they made my vision JUST come to life. Together we made sure to really design each case especially for The Skinny Confidential Community. We wanted something cool but feminine, flirty, witty, & FRESH.

Honestly, I don’t know which one I want to rock first? They’re all my vibe SO I’M CONFLICTED!

Thinking I’ll start with Always Make The Guy Carry Your Purse because YES (!!!).

Which is your favorite? Be sure to tag @theskinnyconfidential in your Instagram photos of the cases so I can STALK !!!

As always, THANK you for your support. Very excited to finally share this cheeky TSC collection with you guys.

Stalk the cases here.

Enjoy! – lauryn <3


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