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The Pressures Of Social Media: Why Do We Even Care & 3 Tips To Disconnect

by
LAURYN

surprise party birthday decor decorating tips how to easy by the skinny confidentialLet me set the scene: Michael & I went to Cabo for my birthday in May ( hence the Barbie Dreamhouse set up! ). Everything was rocking & rolling. Like it was all laid out- exactly how I wanted it. Nails, check! Spray tan, check! Suitcase packed with neon outfits, check! Very Cabo-y braids, check! Plane ticket, check!

You get it.

You know what though? We got there all ready to go- picture us: all dressed up, smiling & glad handing because, shit we’re going to Cabo!! We are ready to party.

So we go to the ticket counter to check-in, in the best mood ever. AND…

…Michael accidentally booked us flights to San Francisco!

San Francisco!

::crickets::

Because that looks like Cabo! San! Lucas!

No, not really, at all actually. They’re quite opposite.

Bubble was popped- my face looked like my first born was stolen out of the crib. FML!

WRONG DESTINATION.

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It’s 7:34 am, on my birthday, & I look kinda cute. Like I put effort into it, you know? I’m ready to party! Maybe drink too many margaritas! Stuff my face with chips & spicy guac! Get naked!

Wah, wah.

SOOO…while Michael’s panicky, I go ahead & take matters into my own hands- there I am with a full Cabo, neon get-up at the butt crack of dawn, rocking vibey braids trying to discuss other options with the man at the front desk.

Oh wait, options?! Any options?! Because there aren’t any- very much NO options.

Basically we had the option to fly to San Francisco only to fly straight to Cabo ( no ), we could drive to LA & fly out of LA at 8 pm at night ( no ), or we could take a private jet for 13401038343 dollars ( no ).

“Oh but wait! There’s one flight to Cabo in 30 minutes- we can put one of you on it!.”

Michael says: “yes, Lauryn- you get on the flight. You fly down to Cabo by yourself & drink margaritas and stuff your face with tacos & I’ll meet you down there. In fact, I’ll drive to LA in an Uber by myself & get on the 8 pm flight to Cabo.”

So that’s what we did: I flew in, drank my margarita(s) alone & Michael came much, much later.

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This sucked because Del Cabo Event Design had planned a big party for me & Michael was going to surprise me ( see the set-up!! ). We had a whole surprise situation happen- he streamlined the whole thing. I wanted to take Instagrams, God damn it! What about my Stories? ( LOL ). My videos I planned on!! Oh me, oh my, oh no!

( In retrospect: NOT A BIG DEAL, WHO CARES? It’s such a stupid, out of touch “problem”- that’s the whole point though- why is social media making us care about shit that’s not even a big deal? ).

You get the drift- I felt like we had this whole plan- one that we would be enjoying in a VERY romantic way & one that I looked forward to sharing on social.

Clearly the grand plan fell through- I was alone on my birthday, not feeling like doing anything…& definitely not feeling like hopping on social media.

The point of the story isn’t to complain- in fact, shit happens & I try to always go with it. Just go with the flow. Be cool, don’t be all uncool ( #RHONY ).

The point of this story is to talk about pressure.

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Pressure when it comes to something we all know: social media.

This story is just one, small, stupid example of how social media can have such an emphasis on the day. Even control the day. If Michael’s flight had the same issue 20 years ago would I have cared as much? Is the pressure of posting day in & day out becoming too much? I feel like it’s ridiculous sometimes.

I mean, perhaps I’m being dramatic but I can’t be the only one who thinks there’s a lot of pressure when it comes to social media, right? Anyone?

So anyway, THIS SPECIFIC post has been a long time coming- it’s one that I feel like most of you will relate to. It’s a fairly new pressure- but one that is there. It lingers like a thick air over a lot of people’s head, kind of like a heavy air: SOCIAL MEDIA PRESSURE.

Whether it’s the pressure to have things a specific way, the pressure to keep up ( with the Kardashians…I kid, I kid- but like can we talk about Kylie’s 21st birthday Barbie ponytail? ), the pressure to post, the pressure to look a certain way- most of us have felt it. It’s that thick air of the pressure as it pertains to social media.

Let me be honest here: there’s nothing worse when you’re having like a melon & prosciutto moment with a stemmed glass of chilled rosé, relaxing with friends by the pool- you’re laughing, joking, connecting…& then it hits you like a ton of bricks: should I be documenting this?

The worst, right?

If you’re me, you scold yourself! You’re like “shit, bitch can you enjoy the moment?”

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LOLZ- but I feel like it’s difficult sometimes to disconnect & not feel the pressure of sharing your life on social media. More so I think if you’re a blogger, sure. BUT I know women everywhere can fall into the pressures. Whether it’s pressure to post or pressure to look a certain way or even pressure to keep up.

So here’s my SIMPLE advice, 3 things that have worked for me:

♡ DISCONNECT & LET IT DIE

So easy- let your phone die. I did this Saturday night & didn’t really touch my phone until Monday morning. It was GLORIOUS- so relaxing. I hung out. I connected with friends by the pool with melon & prosciutto & a stemmed glass of rosé too. Don’t mean to brag but…it’s true! NO PHONE. It was like a breath of fresh air.

The trick here is to let your phone die- don’t trust yourself to put it away. If it’s dead, you’re golden- so much less temptation.

♡ TAKE 10 MINUTES FOR MEDITATION

Every morning I do Headspace- easy. The first 10 minutes of the day sets the tone so much. I wake up, drink my water with lemon, open the shade, & get back in bed to meditate for 10 minutes. I close my eyes & let my mind wander. I used to pick up my phone & scroll- not anymore ever. I vow to never start my day again with a phone in hand, scrolling. I feel like that’s giving into the pressure of social media, you know?

For me, when I start the day looking at my phone it throws the whole day off. I don’t want that to be the foundation of my day. Does anyone else feel like this? I mean sure I’m guilty of checking my phone sometimes when I wake up, but I ALWAYS feel better whenever I shift my focus to light, movement, hydration, & meditation.

♡ STOP SCROLLING

Just stop. The less you scroll the less arthritis you will get in your thumb when you’re older. JOKES- but like, I actually feel like that’s going to happen to everyone. I don’t scroll- whenever I find myself scrolling I stop, drop, & roll out. This may sound weird but I try to not look at the feeds- IG feeds or FB feeds- I stay on my own feed or seek out my best friends & family with the SEARCH bar. When I’m out of the feeds, I feel my mindset is stronger- I feel more confident & even unstoppable.

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SO. Sure my Cabo vacation social media content didn’t go as planned. It wasn’t what I imagined but we figured it out. Michael got to Cabo. We had a fabulous time- see the trip here & it all ended up being cool.

Real talk: social media is only pressure if we play into it. AND we don’t have to play into it. It’s sort of a choice if you think about it.

I used to let it dictate my day. But now? It’s not worth it- waste of energy. Or I don’t know, maybe gets the cortisol levels high. I’m not into that.

What tips or tricks keep you sane when it comes to social media? Tell me. Or just listen to a relaxing song, it might make you feel better. Whatever works.

Have the best, non-scrolly day ever. See you tomorrow, lauryn x

Birthday set-up by: Del Cabo Weddings ( video here )
Location: One & Only Palmilla ( video here )
SHOP: purple dress  | shoes | lashes | nail polish

{ pics }

STALK THE BIRTHDAY LOOK


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  1. Kelsey

    Love love love love this!!!! I need to start my day without my phone. New goal. Also new goal: get my ass to bed earlier so I have time to wake up in the morning and do yoga/meditate. Actually this is not a new goal (but an embarrassingly old one). But your post reminded me again!! And to just live my damn life and not give a damn about social. Thanks for keeping it real (as always).

    Reply
  2. Kaitlyn

    I love Headspace! 🙌But I don’t use it as much as I should 😔 I actually have been FB free for over a year and I deleted my instagram too! It feels So freeing!

    Reply
  3. Kristin

    I said fuck it to social media a year ago and deleted it all. It is so liberating. Doing something fantastic without the pressure to share it with the world really lets you just marinate in that special moment. We all need to learn how to value discretion and privacy a little more. It does wonders for the brain. ❤️

    Reply
  4. Matt D.

    I used to do Headspace until I got to doing meditation without it. Now I use something different. Thumb arthritis? I think I already have that. Social media? You can set a specific time for that in the day to keep it under control.

    Reply
  5. kelsey

    I loooove this & needed to hear it so badly!! I’m totally guilty of waking up & scrolling through IG. I even deleted the app off my phone for a week and its insane how many times I grabbed my phone to check Instagram, forgetting that it wasn’t on my phone. It makes me feel better that an influencer like yourself doesn’t scroll – I’m totally trying this too. Thanks Lauryn, you’re the best!

    Reply