The Same Penis Forever Playlist

The sign really popped out of the bushes all weekend, you know. Front & center, it read: SAME PENIS FOREVER.

All sparkly & glittery, reminding me every second while I downed the chilled rosé.

Couldn’t really avoid the sign, it stuck out like a sore thumb.

…Ok, ok, but if we’re going to have the same penis forever, let’s definitely have an INSANE playlist? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

( Some of you asked, you can find the sign on Etsy ).

A little side story: the second I got to the house, the demands started. Not like mean demands. Just micro-managing-the-shit-out-of-my-friends demands. Picture Lady Tremaine, the stepmom in Cinderella in bed with her cat, Lucifer LISTING OFF HER absurd scroll of requests. I mean I didn’t actually have Pixy but if I did I’d be petting her aggressively in an evil, diabolical way. So. I was walking around making my annoyingly anal demands ( “WHERE ARE THE FLORAL PRINTED S’MORE STICKS, MIMI!”, “JORDAN WE NEED TO HAVE A DISCO BALL COCKTAIL MOMENT!”, “ERICA IF I DON’T HAVE PINK SUGARED RIMS ON THE MARGARITAS, WHAT’S THE POINT?” ) & suddenly, amidst demands, I REALIZED there was no music.

NONE.

Immediately I cried out for Jordan & basically harassed her all night saying “I DON’T WANT TO LIVE WITHOUT MUSIC POOLSIDE.”

Long story short after 2398472 dramatic statements, Jordan got the music working. THANK GOD!

( FYI, when I act like this Mimi & Jordan call me “Laurie” ).

We listened to the whole playlist & then somehow ended up ( drunk? ) dancing to Britney Spears… but like through the decades. Eer, we started from the beginning & ended up in 2016. Favorite dance moves happened around “Lucky”…I think?

Anyway, below is the actual playlist we listened to all, ALL weekend. Some of you asked on Snap; your wish is my command. I can’t take full credit though, Jordan put it together on a whim & per usual, all her songs are just SO on point.

( she did forgot the Bossanova (!!!), but I won’t go Laurie on her. HA! Jordan, hinty hint for the wedding? )

Ok whether you’re going out this weekend, working out, or commuting — you gotta check out this Spotify playlist, k?

TSC SAME PENIS FOREVER PLAYLIST:

MORE TSC PLAYLISTS FOR YA:

+ The Skinny Confidential Workout Playlist
+ TSC Summer Workout Playlist
+ TSC Does Europe Playlist
+ TSC Kick Yo Ass Into Gear After Thanksgiving Playlist
+ TSC Champagne Dance Party Playlist
+ TSC Sweaty, Sexy Playlist
+ TSC Vibezzz
+ TSC Bougie Bossanova Playlist
+ THE SAME PENIS FOREVER Playlist

♡ | ♡ | ♡

I am especially excited about this playlist because my two cousins, Brandon & Chad of the band Ottopilot, are featured. They’re an INSANE band ( voices are flawless – seriously what happened to me? ) with tons of new songs that JUST dropped. Would love to know what you guys think of their new songs.

Alight, many more bachelorette-inspired posts are coming your way but I had to set the vibe with some tunes. So pop some champagne, turn up the volume, & stay tuned for a VERY bachy week of blog posts. A lot to share.

And hey, if you’re not engaged — who cares? Steal some details for an upcoming sorority party OR a friend’s birthday bash. You can apply any & all of these ideas to your own life. It doesn’t have to be all wedding-y.

Please let me know your thoughts! Anything we’re missing? So easy to add songs to this playlist so the more recommendations, the better.

Going to bed, x

– lauryn ( or Lady Tremaine, whatever works )

SHOP IT: body jewels | buzzed AF hat | cell case | choker | top | skirt | PIPER champagne

+ TWO MORE DAYS to enter the $4000 dollar bachelorette giveaway. It takes 5 seconds to enter. ALSO, new podcast episode is live…guess what it’s about? LOL…basically Michael & I get candid about a BUNCH of random topics. Free to listen.

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Bachelorette-Inspired: