Skip to content

Mini DeLites…& Micromanaging

mini delites presents | by the skinny confidential-b

{ presents & sprinkles }
mini delites MJ 1 | by the skinny confidential
mini delites MJ 2 | by the skinny confidential
{ living for this color corrector stick ( conceals hyperpigmenation ) }

To be upfront, I am a HUGE micromanager.

Correct. Highly annoying to everyone involved.

I am never mean about it, just specific. Just enough so that when we go to restaurants or bars, the server wants to kill me…but we’re still friends, you know?

Maybe this is because I used to be a cocktail waitress & bartender for 5 years so I know how to butter them up……..?

…Or perhaps I’m delusional AND annoying. HA.

Regardless, lately we’ve been eating out a lot.

I guess it’s something with the summer, but there’s been a lot of birthdays, celebrations, events, nights out with friends, just a lot – so A TON of micromanaging has been taking place.

mini delites cake | by the skinny confidential

{ this weekend we celebrated Fashionlush’s b-day | cake | PC }

After posting this Instagram & admitting my incessant need to micromanage the bartender at every restaurant, I received a lot of Snap messages & Insta comments asking for tips.

Yah, tips.

You know, tips on how to micromanage, be annoying, & remain…casual about it.

So today I figured I’d share a few of my favorite ways to be annoying.

Firstly, the drink always has to be micromanaged. Sometimes I’ll even excuse myself & go to the bar when sitting at a table. I really try not to be annoying about it, basically I always tip the bartender 20% or more & make it a point to always say ‘please, thank you, and YUM.’

Kindness always.

For a skinny margarita, which I’ve been really loving lately ( see here ), I always say “not too sweet, rocks & half rim of salt, blanco tequila, a dash of Cointreau, extra lemons / limes, & a speck of sweet & sour ( correct, I say ‘speck’ ). The lighter the color, the better.”

After they make it for me, I express my gratitude! Always. Even if it’s not so good. If it’s not done the way I like, I’ll ask for a glass with ice & soda water. Then ( & YES, I am this crazy ): I will pour it over ice & add sparkling water. Easy.

But honestly, I micromanage the bartender so much now that it’s usually perfect.

Michael wants to stab me.

mini delites clipboard | by the skinny confidential

{ festive calendar clipboard for a new project }

mini delites glasses | by the skinny confidential

{ close-up of these glasses, because I FOUND THEM FOR $6 DOLLARS — in love }

As far as appetizers & entrees go, I modify.

Usually the waiters don’t care at all.

Some things I usually ( nicely ) ask for: extra sides of lemon and lime, a big side of avocado, chili flakes, light cheese, extra side of arugula ( perfect on pizza! ), sliced jalapeño, & / or a side of olive oil.

For salad dressings, I’ll usually ask them to dress it with red wine vinegar ( white is good too ), olive oil, lemon, & chili flakes. Kind of making my own TSC Dressing.

I keep appetizers simple. There’s nothing better than prosciutto & cantaloupe OR oysters to start the meal. The protein fills you up a lot.

For meats & fish, I’ll ask for the sauce on the side & have them cover it with olive oil & lemon.

For pastas, I ask if I can order half, extra spicy. Usually, you always can. In fact, I don’t think I can recall a restaurant saying NO… ever.

For a vegetarian entree, I ask them to use olive oil & lemon as opposed to a heavy sauce.

For desserts, I ask for an extra side of berries…so at least I feel like I’m getting nutrients? Then always ( ALWAYS !! ) a cup of peppermint tea. Something about it after a meal just works, you know?

mini delites glass horse | by the skinny confidential

{ a tiny glass horse, hand blown in Venice }

Last tip: whenever I have an entree that’s just A LOT, I only eat half.


These are my micromanaging tips. Servers usually don’t get pissed, as long as you’re gracious, kind, & appreciative.

I mean I never got mad when I was a bartender if someone was nice! It was the rude drunks that got to me…but that’s a different story for a different day. LOL.

Does anyone else have any micromanaging tips? PLZ SHARE.

SO! That’s what’s been going on lately: a lot of micromanaging. Also a new podcast episode IS LIVE so make sure you’re subscribed!!

I’m off to bed, it’s 2:14 AM & Monday has nearly killed me. At least my e-mail inbox is slowly dwindling – this morning was QUITE interesting to say the least.

See you guys tomorrow! lauryn x

mini delites plants | by the skinny confidential
mini delites plants 2 | by the skinny confidential
{ my stepmom hooked it up with the fake plants: }


  1. I micromanage too but it started because I am kind of picky, sorry but mayo may be the most disgusting thing on the planet and why is it a staple on so many things?

    My husband wants to kick my ass but seriously, with the cost of eating out, why not. But, yes! being nice is always the key. They usually always work with me.

    As a side note, if I forget to order no mayo or whatever else I don’t want, I NEVER send it back. I know myself well enough to know I should always ask so if I forget, my fault, I deal with it.

    And one other tip from a former waitress and bartender (me), when you want sides of something or extra whatever, get it together and know what you want all at once….don’t be sending the waitress back and forth asking for more crap.

    1. I LOVE that tip Christy! Asking for everything at once saves the waitress or bartender so much energy and I think they appreciate that. Thanks for sharing

  2. Love this post! Not sure if you ever order Cosmopolitans but what’s a good way to order that? I swear, it’s such an easy drink but some restaurants just don’t know how to make them properly. The WORST is when they serve them with artificial lime juice. Any tips would be appreciated!

    1. You should play around with a recipe at home and see what makes the perfect cosmopolitan for you! Then ask the bartender to recreate it in the same way I ask them to create the marg! Let me know how that works for you Allie

  3. I actually think it’s starting to become more acceptable to micro-manage at restuarants these days. I really think it depends on the quality of the restaurant however – if you go to a bog-standard pub and pay £5 for a meal then people are going to get annoyed, BUT, if you’re paying a hefty amount for what you’re eating then why shouldn’t you get exactly what you want?!

    Steph – www,

    1. That’s a good point Steph! So many people have dietary restrictions that it’s not a complete shock anymore. xx

  4. thanks for the solid tips! going to try this out on Friday while ordering my margs…I’m always hesitant to be too demanding during a busy evening at a restaurant (as a former server, i feel the pain), but worth a (gracious) shot 🙂

    1. Your health is worth it Cait!! Just focus on being really nice and appreciate. Let me know how it goes : )) xx

  5. I love the micromanaging tip! Hey you only get what you want if you ask & say thank you!

    xx. The Coastal Confidence

  6. ha! I loved this post! ex-bartender over here and totally agree with you… the micromanagers never annoyed me (hi, I’m in the club too), but the drunk dudebros were the worst.

    I love your tips too! They really are not too out of the way, since all restaurants for the most part keep them stocked. The tip about ordering half of a heavy dish is great too – I def need to start doing that. I remember when I worked in restaurants, more times than not the POS system (literally the worst acronym for that) had an option for “half”. I also really appreciate you mentioning tipping 20%+. Like you said, that, a smile, and an appreciative Yummmm sure goes far! All about that appreciation.

    My micromanaging tendencies come out at its peak the second I see watermelon in a bar. All about straight up watermelon, gin, lemon, and mint. Nothing else needed! A big tip I do is to ask for literally EVERYTHING on the side – literally everything. Then I have a build your own situation and I like that control. Luckily, my boyfriend is a bigger micromanager than me, so he makes it easy for me 😉 xx Shannon

  7. When I was a server I actually preferred when people could verbalize what they wanted rather than not saying anything and huffing & puffing and complaining after they get their food!

  8. Thanks for this, literally every time you post about your drinks (which is literally what I wish was just on every menu) I am like, “how many eye rolls is she getting” but you give me hope that I’m not ruining servers lives, so thank you!

  9. Okay, out of ALL the posts I’ve seen from you, this goes down as a top 3 favorite. “I’m sharing ways to be annoying,” BAHAHAHAHA Yassssss!

  10. I literally love this post. You’re totally right on point with whole being sweet to the bartender is key. What was your craziest experience while bartending? LOL

  11. I think living in Cali makes this stuff much easier, too! Restaurant staff on the west coat are way more used to/cool with micro-managing than places on the east coast (other than NYC, that is).

  12. I HATE when bars offer pre-made margarita “juice”… basically. I always micromanage my own margaritas too! Drinking all that sugar makes me feel like I’m going to get cavities on the spot, plus it never helps the hangover. Thanks for sharing!

  13. Love that you micromanage the bartender too! I feel like I constantly do this everywhere I go because I hate sugary drinks and I’m very specific.
    On a side note, I find it pretty amazing how you and Michael managed to bring back that dainty little hand blown glass horse all of the way across the world without it breaking! 🙂 #goals


  14. Loved this post. Props to the babes who asked you about it! I totally feel like you shouild be able to ask for what you want at a restaurant. I know it’s a challenge but if you laugh at yourself while you do it, and like you said express gratitude it should be all good.

    You’re paying for it ya know!

    Super cute to see you at Erica’s party, I loved it.

    Have the best week!

  15. Micromanaging waiters is my life. I don’t think I’ve ever NOT modified something when I eat out. I always ask what everything is cooked in/ how it’s cooked and ask them to either cook it in olive oil or cook it dry if they can’t use olive oil because usually restaurants cook proteins and veggies in canola oil (ew). I ask for pretty much every sauce to come on the side in case I don’t like it or it looks questionable.
    Also, usually the first thing I do when I sit down is ask for olive oil and vinegar and a plate of lemon wedges so I have something as a dressing for salad, veggies, and potentially protein. I also ask for a cup of plain hot water and either use my own tea bags (because I always want 100% pure peppermint tea with no additives or “natural flavors!”) or put some of the lemon wedges into the hot water if I don’t want tea. And I always ask for a side of avo, of course. Many more, but those are my MUSTS every time!

  16. i don’t know how i stumbled upon this post but it’s freakin GOLD – thank you for not making me feel bad about being a crazy micro manager esp. when i go out to eat LOL! <3

  17. Ι got this site from my friend who infօrmed me concerning this website and at the moment this time I am νisiting this site
    and readіng very informative postѕ at this time.

Questions, Comments, Thoughts?

Get the Skinny

Stalk Us

This is the best way to stay up to date with The Skinny Confidential. Be the first to know when episodes drop, new blog posts, and product launches.