Today on the blog we have Tamarin Oblowitz. Tamarin is a psychologist who combines psychotherapy with her spiritual beliefs and experiences to support women in their life journeys.
She is intuitive, smart, fascinated by the human condition & helps women all over the word with inner healing, empowerment & self-love. You may have seen her articles on Poosh & Miranda Kerr’s blog too!
And we are just so excited to have her. With that, let’s welcome Tamarin to the blog.
Healing is a common buzzword nowadays, and I want to talk about what Inner Healing is, and how to achieve it. Although the title could imply that this post is a quick road map to Healing, I want to start off by disclaiming, that there is no quick fix or quick method to Inner Healing.
But first, a bit about me: I hold a Masters in Clinical Psychology, and I have trained at prestigious clinics in Beverly Hills, California.
Through my travels, attending Balinese healing + yoga retreats, and life experiences, I merged my Clinical Psychotherapy experience and background with my spiritual guidance, intuitive and energetic healing capabilities. And so, EmpowHER Healing was born. I now call Sydney, Australia, home, after living in the US for 10+ years!
I offer one-on-one sessions (in person and virtual) which weave the wisdom of many modalities, merging the traditional psychotherapy model with more holistic + spiritual guidance + healing. My sessions are powerful (even if I say so myself!) and they aim to cultivate the deep transformation driven by one’s readiness to discover their own potential for self-love, empowerment, expansion, and healing. Clients leave my sessions with their souls feeling aligned, empowered, expanded, and transformed.
Healing doesn’t just happen, because we want it to. Inner Healing requires deep dedication and requires consistency and commitment, and with these ingredients, it is possible to bake your way to Inner Healing.
So how do you Heal?
6 Ways To Inner Healing
♡ Find a mentor/coach/therapist
We all have blind-spots about ourselves, there are things we know we need to change, but we may not know how to implement changes or perhaps we are oblivious to what needs to be changed. It is therefore essential to find someone who’s work resonates with you, to assist you on your Healing journey. This person can also gently call you out on your patterns, and hold you accountable too. Finding someone to assist you on your journey is an imperative first step to Inner Healing.
♡ Shadow work
Our shadows are the parts of ourselves that we would prefer not to confront or face. They are our deepest wounds and have us believing we are flawed, unlovable, undeserving, or unworthy. These shadows surfaced during our early childhood. Our shadow is the aspect we would prefer to leave hidden, or unseen. Your shadows are attributes of yourself that you consciously or unconsciously reject.
What do you not like about yourself? What have you been called out on before? Perhaps it’s a need for control, or the ability to be controlling. Perhaps it’s your constant need for validation or attention. Maybe it’s your pattern of people-pleasing.
Shadow work involves facing those parts of ourselves that we would rather shove in a box, lock up, throw away the key, and just pretend don’t exist.
Shadow work leads us to take accountability for our triggers, and guides us to heal deeply within.
Steps in shadow work:
+ Identify your Shadows
What are the personality traits within yourself you dislike? It could be your difficulty in taking accountability, your potential for jealousy, the need to control, a need for external approval or validation, or the tendency to judge others frequently.
+ Explore the origin of your Shadows
Ask yourself: what is the origin of your Shadow? Where does it come from? Does it stem from your childhood? A past trauma? Did you see your parents or primary caregivers behaving in a similar or certain way? Try to identify the core of where your shadow(s) come from.
+ Embrace your Shadow(s)
Do not look down on it. Do not attach judgment to it. And do not reject it. Simply accept. We all possess flaws and shadows. Our soul is here to expand, evolve, and shift. Doing the shadow work enables this.
For years, many people recommended meditation to me, and I would internally roll my eyes. It seemed too difficult. Ironically, meditation is an absolute staple of my daily life. If I forego one of my meditations, I feel it in my interactions.
Meditation is one of those things that is so deeply felt. It impacts your nervous system when you do it, and it impacts your nervous system when you forego it.
Since meditation has become a constant in my daily life, I feel calmer, more grounded, and equipped to deal with stressful / anxiety-provoking situations.
Meditation doesn’t abolish stress or anxiety, but it helps us to confront stress and anxiety in a less panicked way.
I practice Vedic (Transcendental meditation), but one of my favorite meditations to guide clients through is a:
~ Gently close your eyes.
~ Take a few deep, cleansing breaths – breathing in and breathing out.
~ After your cleansing breaths, take a few conscious breaths, inhaling for the count of 3, holding your breath for the count of 6, and exhaling for the count of 9.
~ Allow your breathing to become organic, without counting.
~ Focus on your root chakra (the base of your spin, your tailbone/coccyx area).
~ Imagine that this area of your root chakra has roots, like a tree, or a vegetable in the ground, and these roots are flowing into the earth below you, pulling you down, grounding and earthing you.
~ Imagine that these roots also extend from your hands and feet into the earth beneath you.
~ Now, visualize that as you inhale your entire root chakra area is filled with rich, fertile, soil. This soil is filled with high vibing energy. As you breathe in, you’re breathing in an energy of vitality, abundance, hope.
~ As you exhale, imagine that you are releasing fear, anxiety, distrust, or any feelings of unsafety. With every exhale, imagine that your entire root chakra is filling up with red. Imagine that you are slowly painting your root chakra with red paint.
~ Sit and feel your connection to the earth. Inhale the energy you need. Exhale the energy you’re wanting to release.
Repeat as often as you feel necessary.
One of my favorite ways of reflecting is through journaling. Journaling enables us to write in a free-flowing way, where we do not have to actively think about what we are writing. It therefore allows our unconscious to gently rise to the surface, and become a part of our consciousness, on paper.
Journaling becomes a catalyst for deep Inner Healing, as we uncover thoughts, feelings and patterns we didn’t even know we possessed. It allows us to go deeper, bringing our awareness to what needs to be healed, and what we need to commit to working on healing within ourselves.
Whether it be self-forgiveness, or forgiveness of others.
Forgiveness is an imperative component to Inner Healing. It is best to use your journaling practice, or even grab a pen and paper, and start to write down who you need to forgive, and why you need to forgive this person/people.
Also reflect on why you have been unable to forgive them up until now and any thoughts or feelings you have around why you have been blocked in your ability to forgive this person/people. Furthermore, explore and write down what you feel you need to forgive yourself for, and how you can implement ways to forgive yourself. If you get stuck with this method, you can always seek outside assistance in a coach/healer/therapist or mentor, if you are not already working with someone.
Immersing yourself is nature is completely underrated! Nature regulates our nervous system, which in turn, helps us on our Inner Healing journey. When we are emotionally regulated more often, we are able to heal at a deeper level. Consider going for daily walks in nature, grounding/earthing (placing your bare feet on the grass or ground), taking an ocean dip, or placing your hands on a tree. Nature is a huge healing force and can bring deep healing, when we create space to connect with it.
We hope you loved this post. Be sure to stalk Tamarin on IG for tons of inspo, empowerment & deep healing tips.
x, The Skinny Confidential team.
+ for more on journaling, check out this post on the HOT MINUTE PLANNER.
++ stalk all the details on Lauryn’s meditation routine here.