HOW TO BE A CONFIDENT BADASS IN AN INSTANT 5 | by the skinny confidential

HOW TO BE A CONFIDENT BADASS IN AN INSTANT

June 27, 2017
by
LAURYN

HOW TO BE A CONFIDENT BADASS IN AN INSTANT 5 | by the skinny confidential

Confidence is essential.

I’m serious though. It really does make all the difference when you’re confident. It shines through your pores- everyone sees the aura of confidence. AND it’s also V contagious so sprinkle it everywhere you go, you know?

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::sprinkle, sprinkle, sprinklity, sprinkle::

To elaborate, there’s nothing better than seeing women in The Skinny Confidential Community THRIVE WITH CONFIDENCE.

SOAR! FLOURISH! PROSPER! ROCK IT.

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WHO DOESN’T LOVE being around confident people? There’s nothing more settling than seeing someone who’s entirely comfortable with who they are…HOWEVER I get it, 2017 social media though can be a real confidence killer. BUT instead of throwing a pity party, I WANT EVERYONE TO GET THEIR GROOVE BACK. Like up the confidence levels- kick it up a notch- confidence on crack.

Because you are all unique in your own way. You are you. There’s only one of you. OWN IT.

Before I give you five QUICK tips, ask yourself: “are you as confident as you want to be?” If not, read on & then GET ON WITH YOUR BAD SELF.

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1.) GRATITUDE. LET IT SEEP OUT OF YOUR PORES.

SIMPLE. Not much to say here. Be grateful for the good. There really is so much to be grateful for. You are in charge of creating your future. Design wisely.

Be grateful to even have the option to be able to design that future.

As the amazing, Gary Vee says “you could have been a tree.”

Ya, he’s right though- you coulda been a f-ing tree.

So smile, laugh, be grateful.

I’m grateful for this platform, my dogs, family, friends, lentil pasta, Michael’s unnecessary purchases, these denim sandals, & the ability to beat to the tune of my own drum. YOUR TURN! Go…

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2.) FOCUS ON YOUR OWN SHIT.

Again, simple. Gaining confidence is not a mathematical equation.

It really is that simple though? To focus on your own shit.

Stop spending time focusing on Sally who didn’t complete her work for the day or Henry whose social media following is bigger than yours…because Sally is doing Sally & Henry’s success isn’t taking away from yours.

Like WHAT a yawn.

Busy bodies are only hurting themselves.

Next time you find yourself fixating on other people’s shit or social media, CHECK YOURSELF. 7 second rule: acknowledge the feeling & move on from it.

denim fringe sandals | by the skinny confidential

3.) STEP OUTTA YOUR COMFORT ZONE.

Everyone fails. Everyone. And if you don’t fail then have you ever lived? Full transparency here: I thrive off people telling me no. People telling me I can’t do something. Even people not taking me seriously. Honestly it revs my engine. This all stems from stepping out of my comfort zone. I mean the first day I nervously launched The Skinny Confidential someone said “you don’t have a nutritionist degree though, Lauryn- you should go back to school first. I think you should wait until you’re more experienced”

TYSM FOR YOUR CONCERN BUT NOPE.

I did what I set out to do because I didn’t listen to other people’s opinions AND I stepped the F outta my comfort zone.

Step out, stay out ( PLZ NEVER GO BACK IN ), own it, & love every second of getting uncomfortable to eventually be comfortable.

Just by doing that, it will up your confidence levels. Trust meeeee.

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4.) HANG OUT…ALONE.

This is my favorite tip ever.

I am alone all the time.

I eat out alone.

I workout alone.

I run errands alone.

I LOVE BEING ALONE.

Eating out alone is a great way to get comfortable with yourself. I bring my computer ( call & check how the WiFi is first ) to my secret hole in the wall sushi restaurant, order a spicy veggie roll, maybe a glass of champagne, & sit with a men’s hoodie on in the corner on a high top table…sometimes for 4 ( eer, 5? ) hours at a time. CASUAL. It gives me pleasure ( & confidence ).

Besides hanging out alone is cool…& it recharges your battery.

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HOW TO BE A CONFIDENT BADASS IN AN INSTANT 2 | by the skinny confidential
5.) DRESS UP FOR NO ONE.

Dressing up for myself is happening more & more lately. I like to look nice…for myself. It makes me feel good to walk into a room dressed to impress. Not to impress anyone else though, just for me.

A little SPF tinted moisturizer, some VOLUMIZING mascara, brow tint or powder ( duh, of course ), & a power outfit and I’m ready to conquer the world, laptop in hand.

Maybe I’ll even stop by my hole in the wall sushi restaurant after my meeting…I’ll just make sure I have an oversized hoodie nearby.

( By the way throwing on red lipstick boosts my confidence immediately. Especially if the tone is right ).

OH & speaking of clothes? I feel like we need to discuss this outfit. BECAUSE I LOVE IT. It’s so me. From the black tight jeans to the denim strappy sandals to the Lynyrd Skynyrd tee– it’s casual, chic & I could wear it everyday of the week. It’s a real confidence booster too because the whole look is F L A T T E R I N G. Anyone watch my latest IG LIVE? Well, this is the exact outfit I was wearing! The whole look is head to toe Nordstrom which I’m sure you’re not surprised about. When I’m looking for any kind of black jeans I go to Nordstrom– their shipping is QUICK AF, the jeans are always quality, AND they’re not overly trendy. For instance, these Frame jeans– I’ve worn them 100 times because they’re a real classic ( big fan of their Madewell jean selection too ). Also you should know I found a $24 version of my sunglasses. No seriously, they look JUST like them for a cool $24 bucks!

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If you liked this post, you will like the podcast– we discuss so many real deal issues…& you can listen while you cook, clean, drive, do makeup, etc.

See you tomorrow. Happy Sunday!

X lauryn

+ SHOP THE POST: tee | jeans | sunglasses ( $24 version!) | sandals | XL hoops ( similar )

++ this post is in collaboration with Nordstrom. As always all opinions are my own.

{ photos }

OVERSIZED TEE, BLACK SKINNY JEANS, & A POP OF DENIM FOR YA:

OH, ALSO:
 

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  1. Heidi Kokborg

    Love this post, Lauryn! Confidence is SO important. I used to have no freaking confidence at all and look at me now! When you are confident it just makes you glow from the inside out, and people just know that you don’t take shit from nobody! I’m telling you, my life has gotten so much better the moment I decided to believe in myself and be confident!
    Especially love yourself about not comparing yourself to others. Seriously, just focus on your own shit! Also, who has time to focus on everyone else? I sure don’t!

    Reply
    1. Lauryn Post author

      Ahh so glad that you get what I’m saying Hedi, people need to stay in their own lane. Thank you for your support. xx Lauryn

  2. A.

    “Focus on your own shit.” Yaassss. This is something I’m seriously working on because internet envy can get a little too real.

    Reply
  3. Taylor

    I LOVE working out alone & listening to your podcast…I’m alone but I don’t feel alone & I can actual listen & think about what you’re talking about & not be interrupted!! LOVE this look especially the sleek ponytail!

    http://www.taytayrose.com

    Reply
  4. Heather Townsend

    Great advice Lauryn. My confidence is shocking sometimes and you’re so right about stepping out of your comfort zone!

    I’ve got that tee! Absolutely love it! Looks fab on you!
    Heather x

    Reply
  5. Teri Giese

    AGREED!For someone still quite young,(as in numerical);you are quite the wise old soul.Growing up in the 60’s and 70’s,to a VERY unhappy SAHM;I was like,(damn,am smart enough to pass the entrance exam to get into the latty freakin da all girl college prep high school,am going to bust my balls to be anything OTHER than a SAHM!?Then got accepted to universities,all except,for my lack of a math credit to go where my crew was going.But,I really wanted to go alone.I did.No car,no friends,naive as hell.But,I ALSO,am used to and enjoy doing things by myself.I enjoy my own company.Fast forward.Was NOT meant to be a nurse,(as well as a Pre-med/Nursing major+a psych minor,was HARD).Did the usual retail crap,always getting into MGMT.Had lots of loves,engagements,yadada.Fast forward again,as I have digressed!I am a 56 year old badass SAHM,with a 19 year old daughter,a dog,a cat,a rabbit.Am alone a TON!I dress nice,as in make up,hair,cute outfit;to go to Target.Huge deal when I hit the salon!lol.Did a shitload of jobs,accomplishments and travels that even I thought I would be to chicken to do;and do NOT get me started,when dumbass doctors said I would be in a wheelchair by 50!I hike mountains bitches!(have a shitload of health fiascos I fought with medical Professionals with!)That is another day!😉You get my drift.Told all four of my daughters they were each special,and perfect and to always be true to themselves.Bith of my husbands had self esteem issues,told both of them that there was only one of them in the whole universe!Tgey were here for a reason and love themselves first.Self love is key.Love in my badass sister!!🤗😉💗

    Reply
  6. Jess

    Stepping out of my comfort zone TODAY! I was invited to be on a podcast and I am so nervous! My immediate response in my head was NO, but I know I have to do it because it’s so scary && I believe (because Gary Vee said it lol) that video is how we will be consuming everything soon, so I want to get used to it :)) Thanks for always being such a motivator, Lauryn <3

    Reply
  7. Krista Williams

    I was thinking like, okay I maybe will know these tips – but obvi learned something reading these. SO GOOD. I LOVE eating alone and working alone – getting dressed for no one :) I feel so good when I put in the time to get ready, even if it’s small, it never happens but it so key.

    Love this boo!
    xo
    Krista
    http://www.hundredblog.com

    Reply
  8. Alaina

    NUMBER 4. Omg yes yes yes. I recharge when I’m by myself. Sometimes existing is just beyond exhausting, so hanging out with yourself is a game changer. I work from home 3 days a week, and it truly helps to get through the week!

    xx Alaina
    Pumps & Pineapples

    Reply
  9. Tache Forbister

    Hi Lauryn, love this post and look! I’m about to launch my own blog on July 1st (this Saturday) and I’m really anxious about sharing it on FB and insta for EVERYONE I know to see. When you launched TSC did you share with everyone in your life or wait until you gathered some momentum? I want to be confident and say screw the people I know who don’t get it and think it’s weird but it’s hard. I’d love to know how you handled your launch!

    Reply
    1. Lauryn Post author

      Good for you Tache, when I started I shared with family and friends and they helped to spread the word. Good luck! xx

  10. Melina

    This outfit seeps confidence. I’ve been getting more and more confident throughout the years and I really want it to seep off of me. I always forget to just do me. Stop worrying about others. Another thing I could work on is to spend more time alone. I find it so difficult to do that in public. I can obviously do that at my home, but I’ve been taking baby steps to do that in public more often. I gonna repeat this mantra in my head until it finally sticks. Thanks xxx

    Melina | http://www.ivefoundwaldo.com

    Reply
  11. Emily

    YES to spending time alone! Recently I stopped committing to every social plan I was invited to and it’s honestly made me so much happier. Really does recharge the battery. I love the podcast and I listen every week while I do my makeup – thanks for asking Kaitlyn B. listener questions on the latest podcast, it was awesome to include the audience! Keep doing you and never change xoxo

    Reply
  12. Janet Fazio

    Love, love, love this. I too savor my alone time and have no issues eating out solo. What I do need to do stat is start dressing up for me.

    Reply
  13. Liv

    I so so agree with being comfortable being alone, if you depend on others all the time you cannot expect to flourish x

    Reply
  14. Elin

    Hey Lauryn, first time I have commented though I read your blog all the time. All of this so true, but item 4 stuck out to me because I do this and feel like I am unique because I do.

    I have had people say they want to do something (go to the movies, whatever) and I would be like, then go. I go to movies or for supper by myself all the time. Who the f cares? They will go “oh, no I can’t, it’d be too weird.”

    I don’t get whats so weird about enjoying your own time. Savour the moment. This goes hand in hand with people being so concerned with what others think of them. It’s just so sad.

    Reply