It’s 10:05 PM on Monday & I am feeling so, so, SO much better.
Like last week I was dying & now I’m Richard Simmons dancing with jazz hands on crack.
Thank you, thank you for your well wishes. Many of you guys have become like friends. The e-mails I’ve received have been just insanely amazing & I feel lucky.
Ok so, some random thoughts: suddenly I’ve developed a bizarre kind of social anxiety. Apparently after two months of house arrest, it’s weird going outside. Bright lights, loud noises, gas station germs, nail salon cuticle bits…ANXIETY. So currently I’m trying to get back into real life. It’s as if I’ve forgotten how to be a normal, functioning human being. Like literally why does the freeway have traffic? How do I park to grab a quick coffee? Did I leave the candles burning with the dogs home? ( NO I didn’t, but you get it ). Why is that person staring at my jaw? ( THEY’RE NOT. They’re staring at the scrambled eggs hanging off my numb chin from earlier this morning ).
Anyway. Will let you know how my re-introduction to society goes next week.
Today I went to the doctor for a re-check and he said I’M DOING SO MUCH BETTER. I won’t bore you with the details. Then I went home, finished up some work, & started cooking a Blue Apron meal ( specifically their spicy eggplant pasta ). Mid-cooking Michael walks in & says he’s very stressed, work-wise, & I tell him “YOU NEED TO FIND something else other than work to wind down at night!”
Look at me dishing out advice that I need to give myself. HA.
So he grabs the spatula & finishes cooking the whole meal.
( Note: this is a good way to manipulate a guy into cooking for you ).
Apparently his ‘something else’ is suddenly cooking. Let’s see how long this lasts. Currently Chef Boyardee’s in earphones next to me ( he invested in high quality earphones so he doesn’t have to hear quote on quote “the keys of the keyboard CLACK TOGETHER” ) & listening to the CALM app which is like mediation on steroids.
I’m very excited for tomorrow because I’m attempting a light hike ( & some fucking fresh air ) with my dad. I could really use fresh air. I feel like I’m going insane being inside so much. I know, I know…I’m getting ahead of myself— I need to take it down 27271727 notches, what’s new. But trust me, you’d go crazy too. Anyway, after that my outing will probably consist of grabbing a SmartWater & peach at Whole Foods. Assuming I find parking, which would be weird. Then home, work, cook ( << right Michael? ), sleep. Groundhog day over here.
Can you tell I’m feeling better? ; )
Chat tomorrow, I’m off to enjoy a carrot Kombucha & popcorn. x
P.S. I’m extending TSC giveaway just because! Don’t forget to enter— it’s a goodie.
I bought this striped dress & I COULD NOT BELIEVE HOW UNBELIEVABLY CHIC it was in person. Likeeeeeeeee guys.
It’s the perfect summer dress. I’ll take an Instagram today to show you.
And then the white dress I’m wearing just kind of gave me the oomph to do a full post. Between the two you can’t go wrong, you know?
Also, to be dead honest, I was looking for inspiration for this post & ended up on this red vixen number ( $63 dollars!! It’s going to sell out in a minute )…& couldn’t NOT buy it for the holidays. SO, I swiftly added it to my ASOS cart & now it’s on its way to me…whoops. I’m planning on wearing black suede pumps & my hair STICK straight. MEOW.
Ok so. These babies are dresses I’d rock any day of the week, rain or shine:
Also, lately I’ve been loving navy so number 5 is pretty damn sassy too.
Anyway, I’d love to hear about your favorite summer dresses? Share some cute ones below. I like simple, fitted, not too short, but not too boring. A pop of color sometimes. Think: lady in the front, party in the back.
A lot of you guys already know her & follow her…and if you don’t?
I’m personally drawn to Weslie because she’s relatable & approachable. Ever since I met her through the Internet ( CRAZY! ), we’ve kept in touch & I can say without a doubt she’s SO down to earth.
Weslie also has the cutest family on the planet. Really though, her three kids are too adorable….so if you’re a mom & looking for a little hottie mommy inspo, head over to Weslie’s Instagram & blog— you won’t be disappointed.
Ok so, recently Weslie reached out about something that immediately intrigued me…COFFEE ENEMAS.
I don’t judge until I research! So I encourage you guys to do your own research too & read what Weslie has to say before jumping to conclusions. It actually makes a lot of sense & it’s interesting.
We both felt like The Skinny Confidential was the perfect platform to discuss this taboo subject…because we all know I LOVEEEE DISCUSSING TABOOS SUBJECTS ( aka camel toes, boob jobs ( < coming soon ), Kegals, surgery, birth control, vagina steaming, organic tampons, you get it ). Any other taboo subject ideas, leave them below so I can check them off my list, lol.
Anyway, I have yet to try an enema but I’m certainly curious after this.
And obviously, we aren’t doctors so definitely do your own research before trying an enema. Ok, enjoy:
| Introduce yourself ( AGAIN! Most of you guys already know Weslie ). |
Weslie Christensen: Hello! My name is Weslie and I blog over at Love Chugs. I am a mama of three, Amazon junkie, and Licensed Master Esthetician…so, skin and beauty is kind of my thing. I had a bit of a health/skin crisis last year when I came down with candida and a sluggish thyroid—this lead me to stumble upon the holy grail of natural detoxes: the coffee enema. After a ton of initial hesitation, I tried one out and immediately fell in love with all the health benefits. I forced my family and friends to try it out and they walked away feeling better than ever before. I knew I had to tell Lauryn ( and you guys ) about them, too!
| Ok so, wait. What exactly is an enema?! |
An enema is an at-home procedure that administers liquid into your body through your rectum. Enemas typically are recommended as a treatment for people suffering from constipation, but there are so many more health benefits to these things than just constipation relief. A coffee enema in particular is like a little detoxing powerhouse.
The Gerson institute explains how a coffee enema works best. They state, “The purpose of the coffee enemas is to remove toxins accumulated in the liver and to remove free radicals from the bloodstream. In the 1920s, two German professors tested the effects of infused caffeine on rats. They found that the caffeine travels via the hemorrhoidal vein and the portal system to the liver, opens up the bile ducts and allows the liver to release bile, which contains toxins. The theobromine, theophylline, and the caffeine in coffee dilate blood vessels and bile ducts, relax smooth muscles, and increase the bile flow.”
So layman’s terms: coffee in your bum (not stomach) goes straight to your liver via your portal vein. When the coffee is in your liver it opens all those little capillaries and relaxes muscles that are normally tight—which releases bile and bile is filled with your body’s toxins.
| Why are enemas so taboo? Like, I’m scared. |
I think people are embarrassed to talk about poop. Especially their own poop. Simple as that.
It is kind of embarrassing though, right? Like, I get it. I don’t really want people knowing my bathroom habits either. But guys, EVERYONE POOPS.
| Describe to us the whole process? We need details! |
A.} What you’ll need:
First off, you will need to purchase an enema kit. There are bag options and bucket options…. I use the bag version and don’t have any problems with it, but people seem to love the bucket kind, too. You can shop around here.
Next, you need to buy some premium organic coffee beans. I use PurE Coffee that is made especially for coffee enemas. Did I say it has to be organic? It has to be organic. Guys, ORGANIC!
B.} When to do it?
Ideally, you should do your coffee enema after a bowel movement, so you can retain the coffee for longer. Mornings are best for most people. If you are constipated, do the enema anyway; this will get things moving nicely!
C.} How to prepare the coffee enema:
1.) Grab a saucepan and put 2 tablespoons of your ground organic coffee in the saucepan. Add 3 cups of FILTERED water to the pot.
2.) Bring the coffee and filtered water mixture to a boil, then take if off the heat and let it cool. When it’s body temperature ( you can test this by placing a clean finger into the coffee, it will be neither hot or cold ) strain through a stainless steal or gold mesh strainer into a clean glass-pouring jar.
3.) Head to the bathroom with your strained coffee and set up a space that is comfortable for you to lie down on. Hint: Be near a toilet and use an old towel, as sometimes there can be slight coffee leakage. Grab a pillow and some reading material, or your phone, as you will be here for approximately 12 to 15 minutes.
4.) Now, assemble your enema kit. It must have a tube and nozzle attached to the bucket or bag. Also, make sure you have a place to hang it about 3 feet above ground. A towel rack or shower rod works great.
5.) There will be an attachment near the nozzle that allows you to stop or start the flow of coffee once you have poured it into the bag ( or bucket ). Make sure this is in the ‘off’ position before pouring the coffee into the bag. I’ve learned my lesson with this one too many times!
6.) Once the coffee is in the bag or bucket hold the tube and nozzle over the sink and turn it on to allow the coffee to run through the tube until there are no air bubbles. Stop the flow once you know there are no bubbles left.
7.) Grab some organic coconut oil & apply it to the nozzle tip and your bum, too. Don’t be stingy. This will make insertion easy peasy.
8.) Lie down, relax, and then insert the nozzle till it’s about 1 inch inside the rectum. Turn on the flow of coffee slowly until the bag or bucket is emptied. Take your time with this as you start out. Let your body get used to it. Then, take the nozzle out.
9.) Now you can either remain lying on your right side, or lie on your back with your feet up above head level or resting up against a wall. You can even get wild with it once you’re a bit more confident and do some yoga moves to get the fluid really moving around inside you. And don’t be surprised if you hear some funny squirting noises from your tummy, this is a good sign and an indication of the bile being stimulated for release.
10.) Try to retain the enema for 12 to 15 minutes. You may feel some strong urges to go to the toilet, especially the first few times you try this, but don’t give up! Try to hold on for as long as you can. Quite often the sensations and cramps pass with some deep breathing. As you do these more regularly you will be able to retain the coffee for longer stretches. 15 minutes max is all you need.
11.) When you are ready to release, head to the toilet and let it go…”Let it go, let it go, don’t hold it back anymore!” ( Did I mention I have three kids? I have three kids ).
| Interesting! What are the benefits? |
1. Reduces levels of toxicity by up to 600%.
2. Cleans and heals the colon, improving peristalsis (wave like muscle contraction that aid in moving food—vital for digestions).
3. Increases energy levels, improves mental clarity and mood.
4. Helps with depression, bad moods, and sluggishness.
5. Helps eliminate parasites and candida.
6. Improves digestion, bile flow, and eases bloating.
7. Detoxifies the liver and helps repair the liver.
8. Can help heal chronic health conditions (along with following a mainly raw plant based diet).
9. Helps ease “die-off” or detox reactions during periods of fasting or juice fasting, cleansing or healing.
10. Used regularly in the Gerson Institute treatment protocol for healing cancer patients naturally.
A con for me in the beginning was that it felt a bit time consuming. From start to finish, the whole process takes about 30-40 minutes. I’ve learned to utilize that time more efficiently now that I’m an old pro. I prep the coffee before I get the kids’ breakfast ready, that way the coffee can be cooling down while were doing our morning routine.
| Let’s get real: does it hurt/feel weird having something up your butt?! |
No. Not one bit! The scariest part is inserting the enema nozzle. It’s tiny, by the way–think like the size of a straw, but once it’s in you can’t really feel it.
Holding the coffee solution though…welllll, that’s a different story. It doesn’t hurt. There isn’t any pain involved, but it’s definitely not comfortable. You may feel some cramping here and there, with a whole lot of pressure—but my advice is to take deep breaths when you need to & just power through. Scroll through Instagram, or turn on your favorite podcast. Get your mind off of it, and try to hold it for at least 12 minutes.
| Recommendations if someone is interested? |
I recommend aloneness. HA! But seriously, be totally alone. You don’t want a house full of guests, or the kids barging in. You also can’t exactly jump up in the middle of the process to get the door, or take your dog out. So, plan accordingly.
| How many times do you have to do it to see results? |
I felt results right away, after the very first one! But it is recommended to do a series back to back for a week. So that’s one a day for 7 days straight. After that, you can taper off to 2-3 per week for the next 3 weeks. Then you go to a maintenance schedule, which means you would do one only when you’re feeling a bit sluggish, or off. It’s really easy to be more in tune with your body once it’s detoxed and healthy. You’ll know when one is needed as time goes on.
| Who’s an enema candiate? |
Anyone who is interested in detoxification should definitely look into coffee enemas. I initially started when I found out I had a sluggish thyroid and candida after having my third baby, and I didn’t want to take medication right off the bat. I was aiming to balance out my body naturally when I stumbled upon these, and since doing them I am healthier than ever. I managed to evade medication entirely.
| Pre/post prep tips for an enema? |
It’s always important to be well hydrated, but it’s especially important to keep hydrating while practicing any form of enemas or colon therapy. So make sure to drink water before and after. It’s also a good idea to take a multi-vitamin and mineral supplement when deciding to embark on coffee enemas.
| Any more info we need to know? |
How about a fun fact? It takes your heart only 4 minutes to pump all of the blood throughout your entire body through the liver. During a coffee enema, you aim to hold the coffee for at least 12 minutes so that you can get 3 full rounds of total blood detoxification. Cool, right?
A while ago my girlfriend, Alana, introduced me to Christal. Basically Christal is a badass chick who runs her own business called The Ladies Coach. I checked her out on YouTube & just thought she was amazing! I mean, she’s super spot on when it comes to relationships.
SO. I figured I had to share Christal’s tips/tricks with you guys. Whether you’re struggling through a tough relationship, about to get married ( eek! ), already married, or single & ready to mingle, these tips & tricks WILL resonate.
Anyway, Christal is full of love advice that every girl should know.
Also, I’d love if you guys shared your relationship advice below in the comment section. I have heard the most amazing tips from YOU. Seriously though, I read every single comment!
Ok, happy Sunday night reading…meet Christal:
| Introduce yourself/tell us what you do. |
Christal Fuentes: Hi ladies, my name is Christal Fuentes, I’m a Relationship Coach for women and the founder of The Ladies Coach, which is an online “platform” that gives women access to experts and tools that could make their life a little easier.
| An example of a healthy relationship? |
CF: What I always say is, “The relationship you have with yourself sets the foundation for the relationships you have with others.”
A healthy intimate relationship starts with YOU! Because your standards begin with YOU!
1.| You want respect? You must first RESPECT yourself.
2.| You want to be loved for who you are? You must appreciate and love who you are FIRST.
3.| You want someone who has common values? You have to get to know what those values are FIRST.
4.| You want to be able communicate your needs? You need to FIRST open up that dialogue within, WITHOUT judgment.
5.| You want a PASSIONATE sex life? You have to be able to stop the war you have on your body…. (Yes, ladies I’m talking to YOU!) Your body is beautiful where she is. Appreciate her!
By the way… those are five SOLID keys to a healthy relationship, but notice that they ALL begin with YOU!
You must build that foundation FIRST, because in order to give and receive love, you have to really love who you are and be connected to what you are able to offer.
| An example of an unhealthy relationship? |
CF: An unhealthy/toxic relationship is any relationship based off FEAR.
Whether you are staying in a relationship because you don’t want to be alone, or because you are AFRAID to leave, they are both relationships that are controlled by fear.
But the problem is, when we don’t have a baseline standard for what we will allow from others, we won’t REALIZE that we are in toxic relationships. Most people in toxic relationships have lived in toxicity for so long that they don’t see the danger toxic relationships play.
The next question I will be answering is VERY important if you do realize you are in a FEAR based relationship, but first, here are some examples so you get more of an idea…
If you are afraid to leave a relationship for ANY reason, you are in a fear based relationship.
If you find yourself feeling jealous and untrusting of your mate, you are in a fear based relationship.
If you constantly fight or argue in order to bring temporary passion or even to get attention, you are in a fear based relationship.
If you are unable to truly be yourself, you are in a fear based relationship.
If you are disrespectful to each other either verbally, emotionally or physically, you are in a fear based relationship.
If you do things for your partner hoping for a “return,” you are in a fear based relationship.
If you are afraid of your partner, you are in a fear based relationship.
If you cringe at the thought of communicating your feelings to a significant other, you are in a fear based relationship.
| Advice for someone who’s in a relationship that’s suffocating & poisonous? |
CF: Here is a quote I want you to remember that comes from a teacher I look up to, Tony Robbins… (I might be misquoting it a bit but the point is the same).
“You will stay in a relationship you feel treats you BETTER than how you treat yourself.”
…Let that sink in a bit…
Again, how we treat ourselves sets the STANDARD of how others will treat us, and if we think they treat us BETTER, we will stay in toxic relationships MUCH longer than we need to.
If you or a friend is in an unhealthy relationship, here are few questions I’d like you to answer:
What feeling am I trying to achieve? Example: Is it feeling wanted? Is it fear of being alone?
What top 3 emotions do I feel consistently through this relationship? Are there new feelings I can replace these with?
What 2 things can I start doing now to connect with myself in positive ways and feel MORE of what I want to feel without depending on my relationship?
These questions certainly don’t fix the relationship, but it’s a start to building communication and connection to yourself. Self-dialogue is powerful ladies, so it is important to understand what thoughts & questions are going through our mind.
The more loving and powerful we get with those, the more love and connection we build with ourselves.
| Best tip when it comes to having a happy relationship? |
CF: You have to LIKE the person you are with. Everyone thinks LOVE is most important but the key to really sustaining a healthy relationship is to “like” who they are. I mean, why do we hang around our besties? Because we LIKE who they are and how they make us feel right?
We aren’t forced to be friends with them because we “love” them, we are friends with them because we like the people they are and how they amplify our life. The same should go with your significant other!
When you are best friends, you can open up the communication and allow freedom in your relationship…& that just feels happy!
| Something a woman can do for a man to make them feel special? |
CF: Ladies, appreciate your man!
If you have a good man, he just wants to make you happy, it really is that simple.
The masculine energy just wants to feel purposeful and feel appreciated for what he brings to the relationship. Every guy is different though so it is YOUR job to find what ways HE likes to be celebrated.
| Best way to communicate your feelings to guy? | CF: Wheew! Communication with a guy is SOOOO different than communicating to our fellow ladies. We can’t expect our guy to be “hairier women,” but we often times EXPECT them to understand and communicate the same way our girlfriends do…. And the truth is THEY CAN’T!
With that said, here are 3 things to remember before communicating your feelings:
♡ Leave your ego at the door: This goes for both partners but when we come into a discussion with our ego’s strapped on, we set the other person up for failure immediately. Especially if, God forbid, they say something wrong! Haha!
♡ Be clear about what you want to express: I know this is hard ladies, especially because we are emotional creatures but we have to remember, our men can’t follow along like our girlfriends can! They will loose focus if it’s not clear what you are asking.
♡ Understand their intentions: The KEY to any successful communication is to understand their intentions. But that goes out the window with our significant others because we hold such HIGH expectations of them. Always keep in mind that ( a good man ) will always have your best interests at heart and will only want to serve you. If you remember this, it will allow you to feel more open and safe to him. And a man LOVES to be able to make you feel safe!
| One word to describe a healthy, functioning relationship? |
Super excited/flattered that I was asked to speak at Create & Cultivate: Chicago, which is a conference for women entrepreneurs in the digital space, to connect.
I’ll let the Create & Cultivate team explain it further:
“This is a 365 day conversation around entrepreneurship and being a woman in the modern digital world. We gather the next generation of curious creatives, entrepreneurs and girl bosses to spark conversation around the topics they are passionate about from influencer marketing and brand building to raising money.
At Create & Cultivate you are destined to meet other talented, like-minded creatives, all while learning tips and tricks from some of the best in the business. Attendees get access to a highly curated, impactful one-day program of workshops, mentor sessions, and panels, as well as delicious cocktails, food, pop-up shops, photo booths, gift bags, and more.
Our attendees come to feel inspired, enhance their business, drink killer cocktails and cultivate new friendships in an amazing and beautiful environment! Create & Cultivate has taken place in Brooklyn, Montauk, Los Angeles, Palm Springs and Portland, and continues three times a year, nationwide.
SO. If you’re a brand new blogger or a brand, you have to check out Create & Cultivate. Especially if you’re in the Chicago area.
Dates: Friday, August 14th to Sunday, August 16th.
In all honestly ( & this is NO BULLSHIT ), when I was starting out 4 years ago, I would have figured out a way to go to this conference. It’s all blogging/branding questions answered in one space so it makes it so much easier for someone who’s new-ish to navigate the web space. This isn’t one of those conferences that you go to & realize three days later that you learned NOTHING. This is a conference with resources, amazing influencers, & answers to questions that are weird to ask ( AKA how do bloggers/vloggers make money ). Essentially with this conference, you’re investing in yourself. I’m very excited to be part of it.
I’ll be speaking on branding, content, blogging, & commerce. So COME!
Some other influencers at the conference this year? Rachel Parcell ( Pink Peonies ), Amber Fillerup Clark ( Barefoot Blonde ), Gaby Dalkin ( What’s Gabi Cooking ), Whitney Port ( The Hills ), the founders of The Everyday Girl, Jenny Bernheim ( Margo & Me ), Erica Domesek ( P.S. I Made This… ), Emily Jackson ( The Ivory Lane ), Courtney Wartman ( Head of partnerships at ShopStyle ), Claire Thomas ( Kitchy Kitchen ), Joshua Zad ( owner of Alfred’s Coffee ), My Nguyen ( My Healthy Dish ), & MANY MORE!
WHAT DOES MY TICKET GET ME?
Everything you get is outlined in our ticket center, but let’s put it this way– the opportunity of a lifetime! You get to mix and mingle with the best in the business all while sipping cocktails, shopping and rubbing shoulders with other creatives!
WHAT SHOULD I WEAR?
We suggest comfortable shoes as you are going to be out for the day (or pack a pair of heels in your bag). Beyond that, dress as you would to attend a stylish conference! There will be plenty of photo ops!
If you’re in the Chicago area, I would love restaurant/sight/must-go recommendations. Leave them below!! Oh, & I’ll probably still be Nutty Professor-swollen, but what can I do, ya know? I’m icing my face religiously, pounding turmeric, & drinking green juice so let’s hope I look slightly more presentable in a month. Fingers crossed.